Sunday, February 15, 2009

Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover... Or A Mom

We're all good at judging, aren't we?

I realize that no matter how hard I try, there will always be someone who doesn't understand my parenting, or our situation. And I am, for the most part, a people-pleaser -- so that makes it more difficult. But over the years, I've had situations happen -- like the one I'm about to tell you -- that have helped to teach me, that sometimes, it really doesn't matter. Some people just won't "get it." Ever. And I don't have to feel bad or beat myself up because of it.

My children were recently participants in a two-day swim meet. It was an exciting event, and Josh and Kayla had worked hard to prepare for it. They LOVE swimming and spend several hours each day working out with their team and at the YMCA.

Anyway, this long meet presented new challenges for us because of our need to keep Kayla cool. So, Jeremy stayed with Josh and our other "fans" out on deck, watching the meet -- while Kayla and I hung out in the air-conditioned "hospitality room." The room is a nice retreat for all the coaches and officials to get a drink, a bite to eat, or just a moment of quiet - away from the constant chaos of the fast-paced event.

Kayla participated in five different events, and Josh in three. In between, Kayla would dry off and we'd head for the cool sanctuary. At one point, we'd been in and out for our different events, and there was an official sitting in the corner, going over her paper-work. She frowned at me and watched Kayla sit down with her book. I wasn't quite sure if we'd invaded her space, or if she was unhappy with something else I'd done, but I tried to settle in with Kayla and read.

A few moments later, this woman stood up to leave and she glared in my direction. "Isn't it too cold in here for your swimmer?"

I tried to smile sweetly with my response, "She doesn't sweat."

Before I could explain any further, she pointed at me and scolded, "You should be keeping your swimmer warm." Mumbling under her breath, she left the room.

I felt terrible. She obviously thought I was a horrible mom for freezing my wet child in between swim events. And what made it even worse in my mind is the fact that I didn't have the chance to explain and probably never would. So she had no clue that we were trying to keep Kayla from getting TOO warm in the midst of hundreds upon hundreds of human bodies putting off body heat.

After I sank to the depths of drowning in my own self-deprecation, I had a shocking revelation. It didn't matter. She may have judged me, but it didn't change the fact that I was doing what was best for my child. She didn't have all the facts, so I couldn't expect her to understand.

It made me think about all the times I've judged people in my mind not fully knowing all the facts myself. It's a scary thing. In the grocery store, at church, at swim team. Ouch.

So my thought is this -- maybe we could all work on that this week. One person at a time, one situation at a time, one day at a time.

What do you think?

Friday, February 13, 2009

Valentine's Day Mushiness

Love is in the air. (Or is that the alluring aroma of the pecan pie I made for my husband?)

Since Saturday is Valentine's Day, I'd like this to be an interactive-let's-write-something-ooey-gooey kind of post.

I think everyone should share something mushy. A mushy story of you and your spouse. Or, it could be an almost-coulda-been-mushy-turned-hilarious kind of story. Or even an I-wish-this-would-happen-to-me kind of story.

Who's game?
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And just to get everyone started, here's mine:
For Valentine's Day eighteen years ago, the man who is now my husband presented me with a teddy bear holding a little box. In that little box was the yummiest piece of chocolate ever. (And I am a chocolate snob! So my man knew his stuff.)

As the morsel melted in my mouth, I hugged my sweet guy. We were in Bible College, and neither of us had much money, so his gift meant even more.

Taking my hand he walked me down the hill toward my dorm. Suddenly, he stopped and proclaimed, "Hold on! I forgot something!"

He reached into his pocket and pulled out another little box. This time, the box contained an engagement ring. And I've worn it ever since.
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Now, if you'd like to post a little story, just click on the comments button. And if we don't get very many, I'll know that you are all out there creating new romantic moments to share!

Love is in the air...

_______

Kimberley Woodhouse is a wife, mother, author, and musician with a quick wit and positive outlook despite difficult circumstances. A popular speaker, she’s shared at more than 600 venues across the country. Kimberley and her family's story have garnered national media attention for many years, but most recently her family was chosen for ABC's Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, The Montel Williams Show, and Discovery Health channel’s Mystery ER which premiered in 2008. Her story, Welcome Home: Our Family’s Journey to Extreme Joy, releases in September 2009 from Focus on the Family. Kimberley lives, writes, and homeschools in Colorado with her husband and two children in their truly “extreme” home.
kimberleywoodhouse.com

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Neighbors

We had the experience of being the first home built in our neighborhood. We've been here a year and a half (roughly), and many homes have sprouted since.

A couple of months ago, the kiddos and I made cookies to bring to all the neighbors. Wouldn't you know, not one neighbor was home when we went to deliver them! :) Yes, I know, my life.

Anyway, we will of course, try again - but today, I had a wonderful introduction.

My neighbor who lives behind us stopped by. A beautiful, and incredibly sweet lady - I felt an instant connection. She had stayed away for awhile, like many of our neighbors, because of the whole TV thing. (I have to say that the respect for our privacy has been wonderful and generous.) But I'm so thankful she dropped by today.

We have an odd situation. We don't get out much, so it's hard to get to know most people. The temperature we live in, is also a little too extreme for most people. (I often get cold myself, and I have acclimated to this for years.) LOL

So, my rambling today is just to say how thankful I am for neighbors. I'm thankful for precious people who understand our "weirdness" and love us anyway. And I'm thankful for God bringing new people into our lives.